Fear: False Entities Appearing Real

Fear continues to mess with my head as I travel down this path of building businesses and following my intuition for the first time in my professional career. 

Some people are able to combat fear quickly. That was never my experience. As an avid over thinker, one of the habits that have plagued me for a long time is fear. Here are a list of my fears when it comes to business:

  • That I will be broke
  • That I will fail
  • That I will obtain my definition of success and will either become a giant a-hole or get to that point and not be able to enjoy the success
  • That I will never be happy in anything I do whether it is a 9-5 job or this new path of entrepreneurship

Fear is not real. The things I constantly worry and fear have not come true. A part of me uses fear as a ritual. Let me explain what I mean by fear becoming a ritual.

I used to have a fear of flying. It was an intense fear for the days leading up to the flight. Once the cabin door closed on the airplane I would have a panic attack. My breathing would get heavy, palms sweaty, knees weak, arms would get heavy like that Eminem song, and I would feel this intense feeling like this was the end of my life all throughout the flight. Yes, it was THAT bad. Every flight this would become my ritual and it worked! When I say it worked I mean I would reach my destination safely. Since I didn't die my mind told me "hey if you freak out about the flying process, you will live". So this became a ritual every time I flew. The problem was the amount of stress it would cause me was taking a toll on me mentally. Not to mention I would miss out on trips and missed out on being able to see the world. I'm proud to say that I have no problem flying anymore. I went through a fear of flying program called SOAR which if you are interested can access here.

Perhaps your fear manifests similar to the fear list I mentioned above or you have different fears altogether. Regardless of how your fear shows up the common theme of fears is that they are all in our heads. One way I combat fear is to use this acronym:





This allows me to understand that fears are made up in my head and rarely if ever come to fruition. Fear are the stories we make up in our head about what may happen rather than what actually happens. 

Here are some more tips to work through your fears:

1. Stay in the Present Moment

Worrying about the future and regretting the past will only amplify your fears. Staying in the present moment will help with not worrying. Some things to stay in the present are focusing on breathing and meditation. Staying in the present moment also helps me to realize that there are things in my control like working hard on my businesses, and taking action towards my daily goals and things that are out of my control like the future which is impossible to control because it has not happened yet!

2. Stop Fear in its Tracks

When you feel your fears come up first become aware that it is a fear and has no power unless you give that fear more thought. When we allow the fear to stay in our heads it only intensifies. Realize that this fear is made up in your head. It has no power unless you allow it to have power. 

3. Change the Story in your Head

Instead of thinking about the fear and letting it intensify, change your inner dialogue. For example one of my fears I wrote above is I fear that I will be a business failure and broke. Is that really going to come true? No, because I know I will succeed as long as I work hard and take action every single day on my businesses. Have I ever been broke? Yes, as well as negative $20,000 in different types of debt. It was scary and was a tough but I am resourceful and was able to get myself out of the hole and end up in a great financial situation. Writing down or speaking the new story out loud is also very helpful to move away from fear into reality. 

Fear will always come up, but in order to have a life with less stress and worry it is our response to the various fears that come up that will allow us to have a more mentally healthy life experience and become more productive. 

How do you combat your fears? Let us know in the comments section below.